Learning to see that there is no such thing as failure has been one of the biggest life-changing experience for me.
Whenever you experience something that you think is a ‘failure’, learn to see this thing as a way to figure out what is right and what is not right for you. Of course it’s okay to be sad and down about something not working out the way you had hoped for, but if you can change your way of thinking of it as a failure to a lesson, you have a lot to gain!
Perhaps you have experienced a failed relationship. But don’t view it as a failure and a waste of time. Through that ‘failed’ relationship you learned what it is that you actually want out of a relationship, and what you do not want in one.
“If you learn from defeat, you haven’t really lost”
Perhaps you have experienced a job that was certainly not right for you. Don’t view it as a waste of time or mistake. If you hadn’t had that job, you wouldn’t know what it is that you do not want, and what it is that you do want, in a job.
Learn to see failures not as failures, but as things guiding you towards what is just right for you. Learn to see failures as good things taking you exactly towards where YOU are meant to be, and life will be way more fun and beautiful in this way!
I want to end this little write with reminding you of Thomas Edison, the guy who eventually invented the light bulb. Edison failed many, many times, but said that: “I haven’t failed, I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work“.
One of my big inspirations Marie Forleo, always says that “If it’s not scheduled, it’s not real“, and that’s what I want to talk about today.
If you don’t already know Marie Forleo and her youtube channel MarieTV, then you should definitely check it out! She has so much inspiring content, and has interviews with so many inspirational people (Tony Robbins, Brené Brown, Elizabeth Gilbert, Steven Pressfield etc.).
Anyways, Marie have this saying that “If it’s not scheduled, it’s not real“. And man, is that right! Yet, it’s so easy to forget.
We often have a list of all the things we want to do; workout, do meal prepping, hang out with our friends, work on that project etc. However, if you do not plan it – schedule it – find specific date and time for when to do it, it’s not real.
So in order to make your dreams and goals real, you need to sit down with yourself and plan when and where to work on your goals.
“If it’s not scheduled, it’s not real” – Marie Forleo
Let’s take an example: you want to start working out. That’s great. However, it’s also very unclear and vague. When should that be? And how?
Take your calendar out and make a commitment with yourself: Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday I will go for a 25 minutes run.
Or, it could be: Every Tuesday from 9-11am I’ll work on creating content for my business.
Make it concrete. Make it actionable. Then put it into your calendar, and keep your commitments to yourself!
Question for you: What do you want to work on? Fx do you want to start working out? Do you have a specific project you want to work on? How can you break it down into actionable steps, and schedule it in your calendar?
If you want anything in life, the first step to getting it, is knowing what it is that you want. Get clear on what you want in life.
Sounds pretty obvious, right? However, many of us don’t have a clear vision of exactly what it is that we want, so we don’t really know what we are going after, which can end up with us getting something that we don’t actually want.
Perhaps you have heard about ‘the law of attraction’, which is about how ‘like attract like’ and how what you focus on is what you get more of. Have you ever thought about what your main focus is? Is it on the things that you want in your life? Or, is it on all the things that you think are wrong in your life.
“Clarity is power. The more clear you are about what you want the more likely you are to achieve it” – Billy Cox
Sit down with yourself, and get clear on what you want. You don’t have to have all the answers, but get an idea of the life you want to live. What do you want to do? Where do you want to live? Which people do you want to spend your time with? etc. Consider these things.
Once you have a good idea of what it is that you want, then write it down. Make a list. A list of the things you want in life, and don’t limit yourself, dream big. Write it down, make it visual for yourself.
Once you have written it down, you can start to work on one goal at a time. Take a goal, and break it down into smaller more manageable steps. Then make a plan on when to do what, and just get started.
If you are someone with big dreams and are looking for some real good motivation, then this book is definitely for you! Today I have a BIG book recommendation for you: The Magic of Thinking Big.
Wauw. This book was amazing! I felt so uplifted and inspired all the way through reading it, and I highlighted so much in it. “The Magic of Thinking Big” by David Schwartz is all about how we limit ourselves by our beliefs. We can only achieve what we let ourselves believe is possible. He encourages people to think BIG!
Most importantly of all, he encourages people to ACT on their dreams & visions. Because without action, you will never reach your dreams. He uses this lovely phrase “Action cures fear“. It is such a great phrase, and something I can definitely recognise. Sometimes we work things up in our head, overthink and everything and we never get to do the things we want to do. However, as soon as we start, flow follows and we find that it really isn’t that hard, we just have to take action and begin.
This book contains everything from how to combat limiting beliefs, how to go after your dreams, how to build confidence, how you are what you think and so much more. I will go as far to say, that this is one of the best books I have ever read, I can highly recommend it!
If we want to grow, stretch and reach our dreams, we also need to get grounded. Plant our roots deep in the ground, so we can grow even higher.
“Flying starts from the ground. The more grounded you are, the higher you fly” – J.R. Rim
Do you have big dreams and visions for your future? I do too, but in order to make those dreams a reality and grow high, we also need to ground ourselves and get the foundational work in place.
Fulfil the Basic Needs
If you’ve ever had a psychology class at some point in your life, you might have heard of ‘Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs‘. This theory explains perfectly the concept of getting yourself grounded, in order to reach your own higher potential.
This pyramid starts from the bottom, the first need all human beings needs to get fulfilled physiological needs; air, water, food, shelter, sleep, clothing, sex. If we have not fulfilled these basic needs, we will not begin to start thinking about the next level in the pyramid, because our mind will then only stay focused on fulfilling our very basic human needs.
In our Western society, majority of us people have the two bottom ‘needs’ in place: physiological and safety needs. What we are working on the top 3 layers; love and belonging, esteem and self-actualisation.
So when I say ‘get grounded’, I mean that in order for you to grow, you first need to have these foundations in place. You need to eat food, sleep well, and have a place you feel safe. But what is also important is your relationship towards others, a sense of belonging, and your own self-esteem. A practice to help you with your self-esteem can be the use of positive affirmations.
Remember, that the highest trees, also have the deepest and strongest roots.
Do you have big dreams and visions you want to fulfil? Look at your own life and see where your foundation is not working, and then start working on that. Perhaps you do not sleep enough? Then start working on that. Perhaps your self-esteem is very low? Then start working on that. So, where in your life, can you work on your foundational work? Share it below, or write it down for yourself, and then start working on it.
Sometimes you just need some motivation or some tips and tools for increasing your productivity or for creating new and better habits. Therefore I have 4 books for exactly that, to share with you today!
Books about Productivity
Eat That Frog! – Brian Tracy
‘Eat That Frog!’ is a brilliant little book. It’s a very easy read and very manageable. It’s about how to overcome procrastination. You might recognise the feeling of putting off that one thing that you just keep on postponing? This book gives you the motivation and reasons for why ‘eating that frog’ as the first thing, is the best thing you can do for yourself.
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People – Stephen R. Covey
This book was one of the first ‘self-development’ books I ever read, and it is about the habits that ‘effective / productive’ people have. It covers several different aspects, such as personal management, seeking to understand first rather than to be understood and many other habits that will change your life.
Books about Creating New Habits
Atomic Habits – James Clear
I’ve already made a more in-depth book recommendation about this book, but this book is all about how creating small tiny changes in your life will add up over time and make a big difference for you. It is better to make a little change, and stick to that little habit over time, than it is to set a way too big and unrealistic goal and quit within a week.
The Power of Habit – Charles Duhigg
‘Atomic Habits’ have many of its principle from ‘The Power of Habit’. I think both books are interesting in their own ways, where ‘Atomic Habits’ are more manageable and give good concrete steps to take, ‘The Power of Habit’ give more insights into the psychology behind habits. Why we have them, and why we can have a hard time breaking some habits. So it’s a really fascinating read, especially if you’re into psychology & understanding the human mind.
Having a Growth Mindset can change your life completely. But you have to learn to see things differently, and think differently from what you have been used to, if you want to get this kind of mindset. Invest in yourself, keep learning, exploring and stay open-minded and life will turn into the most interesting adventure you have ever been on!
Fixed Mindset VS. Growth Mindset
A Fixed Mindset sees ourselves as static beings, like we can’t change how things are for us, our character, intelligence or creativity. However, a Growth Mindset thrives on challenge and views failure as new learning opportunities, and new ways of growth. Our entire life is defined by our mindset. Our relationship with success and failure determines our way towards happiness. If you keep seeing a failure as you being a failure and you get sad and miserable over it, this will affect your life. But, if you instead see failure as just another way to have learned something new, and a springboard towards success, your world-view will be entirely different.
How to Gain a Growth Mindset
Keep learning and exploring new things and ways of thinking. Read books, watch documentaries, talk to new people, listen to podcasts, go to new places
See failure not as a failure, but as an opportunity for growth and learning
Focus on the good things in life & the small joys
See life as Yin & Yang, everything is about balance. You need both in your life
Stop telling yourself limiting beliefs, instead go encourage yourself and talk yourself up
Another’s success does not mean that you cannot succeed. Learn to be happy about other people’s successes, and know that there is more than enough to go around for everyone
The book “Think & Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill is a bestselling book, and I completely understand why – it is magical!
The book “Think & Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill has quickly made it to the top of my favourite books. I highlighted so much of the book while reading it, because there was just so much gold in it. The book is primarily about money and how to accumulate riches, but it is also about so much more than just that. It’s about how to get anything in life.
This book is one of the front-goers for the whole ‘manifestation’, ‘law of attraction’ phenomenon, and it is so inspirering and motivating to read. It’s about how you can achieve anything, if you believe you can.
As usual, I don’t want to say too much about the book, because I think you should have the experience of reading it. But I will say that it is life-changing, and that it can really shift your perspective on life.
Below I’ve shared some of my favourite quotes from the book.
Quotes from the book
“Everything which man creates, begins in the form of a thought impulse. Man can create nothing which he does not first conceive in thought”
“You can not get, if you do not give”
“Riches begin in the form of thought. The amount is limited only by the person in whose mind the thought is put into motion”
“One of the most common causes of failure is the habit of quitting when one is overtaken by temporary defeat”
“Our brains become magnetised with the dominating thoughts which we hold in our minds, and, by means which no man is familiar, these “magnets” attract to us the forces, the people, the circumstances of life, which harmonise with the nature of our dominating thoughts”
Here are some of the books that have changed my life. There are, of course, many books that have had an impact on my life, but these are definitely some of the books that have completely changed my life perspective for, what I personally think is, the better. I hope this post can give you some new reading inspiration, and remember that if you choose to always stay open and to keep learning and growing – then wonderful things can happen!
The Magic (aka The Secret)
The Magic by Rhonda Byrne, was a book I discovered back in 2012 in England. It was a time in my life where I had lots of self doubt, and probably way to much doubts about myself and what I should do with my life. Then I came into a bookstore and this magical book just caught my attention. I remember first thinking “I want that!” and then my thoughts convinced me that “no, that is some sort of self-help book, you shouldn’t read that, that’s just stupid“, but after having walked around in the book store for a while I finally decided to buy it. I started reading it as soon as I got back to the hotel, and I was completely in love with it.
This book taught me about Gratitude, the Law of Attraction, Manifestation, and changing your life perspective to focus on the positive things in life. It’s a very practical book, because it has small exercises that you should do each day, and I recommend to completely follow it and do all the exercises. It changed my life, and I’m forever grateful for having discovered this book at the right time in my life.
Money & The Law of Attraction
Money & The Law of Attraction by Esther & Jerry Hicks. I read this book recently, and it’s all about Manifestation & The Law of Attraction. It might be titled ‘money’, but this book is about so much more than just money. It’s about how to focus on the things that you WANT in life, and learning to attract these things into your life. It’s really good, and I probably wrote down half the book in my notebook while reading it, because there was just so much gold in it. If you haven’t heard about Law of Attraction and Manifestation before, then I would recommend reading ‘The Magic‘ first as an introduction to the subject, and then read this book later in your life, when you feel ready to dive deeper into the topic.
The Four Agreements
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is a tiny little book with SO much gold in it. These life advices are some that I wish would be taught to everybody in school, because wauw, these are beautiful. I don’t want to say too much about it, because I think you should experience reading it for yourself. But it is a wonderful little book, that I think everybody should read.
The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success
The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra is another little book which everybody on this Planet should read. It’s also about manifestation, and the flow of life. How in order to receive certain things in life, we must also be willing to give these things ourselves in order to keep the flow of life going. Just like with ‘The Four Agreements’, this is also a beautiful little book, so I don’t want to say too much about it, except for: read it, it’s worth it, it’s another one of those books that could be completely life changing for you.
Big Magic – Creative Living Beyond Fear
Big Magic by Elisabeth Gilbert is a book for creatives. Creatives of all kinds, whether you are a writer, painter, singer, and not only for ‘professional creatives’, but also for people who just practice being creative at home. It’s really inspirering, and gives you such a motivational spark to embrace curiosity and just start creating every time you feel that creative flow coming.
It’s also about overcoming the fear we might have that stop us from creating, which is such a shame, because as she mentions in the book, creating shouldn’t just be for coming up with a final result which we can ‘give’ to others or sell, creating should be something we do for the sake of the experience of creating something, because that is such a wonderful thing.
Think & Grow Rich
Think & Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill is probably one of the foregoers to ‘The Magic’ and ‘Money & The Law of Attraction’, because he spend 25 years of his life learning about what had made successful people successful. This book might be titled ‘think & grow rich’, but this book is about way more than just the financial aspect, it’s about learning a whole new way of thinking which can completely change your life. It’s about finding your purpose, creating plans, staying persistent and believing in it. Again, I don’t want to say too much, because I truly believe that this book should be experienced by reading. But I will say that it’s an amazing book! I have highlighted tons of sentences in the book, I recommended by dad to get it as well, and I also just bought 2 copies for 2 of my friends. This is definitely a game changer!
The 5 Love Languages
The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman is a must-read for everybody. Not just for people wanting to improve their romantic relationship, but for everybody. This book can enhance your understanding of other people, and this can improve all your relationships. It’s about how there are 5 ‘love languages’ and that we all have a primary love language – meaning, a way that we receive and give love. But our partner might have another love language, and then miscommunication can arise as we ‘show and give’ our love in different ways and then the love might not be received by the other person, as this is not their primary love language. So if we can learn our closest ones love languages, then we can learn to ‘give’ love to them in a way that they can receive, which will improve our relationships.
These were the books that have been completely life-changing for me and my life. I would love to know which books have been life changing for your life?
Gratitude. I have written so much about this topic before, but it truly is wonderful to show and feel gratitude, for both the bigger and the smaller things in life. One of the best practices I have come across is to write a letter of gratitude.
When I first discovered ‘the power’ of gratitude, one of the exercises that had the biggest impressions on me and my life, was to write gratitude letters to people who have had an impact on my life. It could both be positive and negative impacts, the important thing was just to write letters to people who had taught me something important about life, and who had had an impact on my life and made me who I am.
In the beginning I wrote these letters for myself, so the people I wrote to never received these words of gratitude, but just the feeling of expressing my gratitude towards these different people had a huge impact on my life. Whether it was for being grateful for what certain people had taught me, or if it was to forgive someone for something they had done which had affected me.
I wrote letters (in my diary), to all kinds of people. To my old Danish teacher in elementary school for cheering on me to “never stop writing“, to my dancing teachers who I looked so much up to when I was younger, to people in high school who was just awesome, to my family members (mom, dad, sis etc.), to my mom’s cousins’ who treated me with so much love like I was their own daughter, to people who disappointed me or just showed me how I did personally not want to be like, to my boyfriend whom showed me true love and happiness, to all the amazing authors who have inspired me with their stories – and so many other people.
“We met for a reason, either you’re a blessing or a lesson” – Frank Ocean
Later on I started to share more of these letters with the people I really loved. I love expressing gratitude and love in the form a personal letter, whether that be to my mom, sister, dad, boyfriend or my friends. The best thing is to see their responses, and see people get touched by my gratitude for them – there is really no better feeling in this world. I can highly recommend to share those words that you might have inside your head, with people that mean something to you. Just think about how happy and grateful you get, when someone says or writes something kind to you.
Try this Gratitude Practice Yourself
Write a letter of gratitude to 10 people who have had an impact on your life.
Remember, you don’t have to show these letters to anyone else than yourself – but if you feel like it, I can definitely recommend sharing the letters with those you love.